Do you have a memory?
by lighhtwoods
Summary: But when you are in love, you cannot just change perfume or town or haircut. You have to change your heart. And how can you do that if your heart is not yours anymore?


**Hi! This is my VERY first fanfic in English. I had wrote this months ago in italian, before the end of season 4. So I didn't know the reason why Klaus had to leave mystic falls and I didn't know that Stefan was locked under the lake for all summer. Anyway we can consider it an alternative universe. I would really appreciate if you review this and tell me what you think and of course If I have to keep translating it. If you find any kind of mistakes or typos (I'm sorry but English is not my native language) please tell me and I'll correct them.**

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"Your life is going on, Caroline, but not with me by your side. You're living a happy life with Tyler, here in Mystic Falls. You're forgetting me and you're doing well" he did not want to compel her, but it was too hard to let her go. If one of them had to suffer, then he doubtless would have chosen himself. "But you must know that I love you. I always will, you are my life. Everything I have done, it was for you. But you already know that" he kissed her on her forehead and walked away from that house. The house that for months had been their secret shelter. The place where nothing bad could happen to them.

"You could try to write something down" Stefan advised to his friend a sort of therapy to try to make him feel better. He could not see him in that condition. "You know, when Elena has chosen _him_ instead of me I was dying just like you now, but my diary helped me. Of course your sister has helped me too, but it doesn't mean that you can't find a cute girl for you too."

The first few months went by very slowly. He felt the passage of time, and the clock ticking, tic-tac-tic-tac, an hour, two, three, a month, two, three, four, five, six. It seemed that he could not wake up anymore. "Enough! React! Do something, I can't stand here watching you doing nothing." Rebekah was furious, in part it was because she cared about his brother after all, and in part it was because she hated her, and now she was happy with his boyfriend and her brother was dying. "Tonight you're going out. You have a date. With me, Stefan and Camille." Klaus watched his sister badly "No, I'm not. End of discussion. And who's that girl?" he asked curios. "My classmate" Rebekah smiled. That night he went out of his house after months.

When he saw her he started to tremble, he felt the tears on his eyes, he was like he was watching the sun. "C-Caroline, what are you doing here?" he was happy for the first time after months. The only woman he had ever loved was in front of him. Rebekah quickly elbowed him. "Nik" she laughed "what are you saying?! Her name is Camille." Indeed her sister was right, she was not her. She was very similar to Caroline, but she was not her. "I'm sorry Camille, it's just that you remind me _someone_… someone very, it doesn't matter."

AUGUST;

SEMPTEMBER;

OCTOBER;

NOVEMBER.

Months went by, this time quickly. He started a relationship with Camille, trying to forget Caroline. A morning he woke up with a sense of melancholy. He felt a weight on his chest, it was like a force that wanted to push him down, again. He watched the screen of his phone. It was the 8th November, it was passed a year since he left _her_. He was too busy to think about her that he did not hear Camille who entered into the room. "Still at bed?" she asked. "Yeah, I feel sick" he lied. "Oh, I'm sorry sweetheart. You want me to take you an aspirin?" she asked smiling and Klaus nodded.

She went out of the room and came back with a glass of water and a little white pill on her hand. "Cami?! Are you here? Come on we are in late!" Rebekah yelled from her car. Camille smiled and gave a kiss to Klaus. He kissed the girl back carelessly.

When he heard the car moving he got out of the bed. His legs were walking alone. They knew exactly where to take him. He went down a step, then another. He was in front of the _door_. That room was him. No one could enter except him. It contained his memories, his life,_ Caroline_.

At the walls were hanged the painting he made of her. In the chest of drawers he put in order the clothes that reminded him her. Because even clothes reminded him her. The white shirt and the black gilet, the first time he talked to her on the day of her birthday, when he saved her life from him. The black shirt, when she told him that she knew that he was in love with her. He also changed perfume because his, without hers, had another smell.

_But when you are in love, you cannot just change perfume or town or haircut. You have to change your heart. And how can you do that if your heart is not yours anymore?_

He collapsed down, destroyed by pain. He cried, screamed, broke a window, but the pain was still with him. It had never left him. It was there, ready to go out when he let his guard down, and that day he did.

"I can't, I can't. Someone saves me. Caroline.." he was saying these words, lying down on the floor. His arms and legs were crushed on the cold floor that pressed his back. He was waiting that the pain passed but it did not. Then he decided to let himself go, again. He sank into the abyss of memories, it was like dying every seconds that passed.


End file.
